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Cuck Tales: Road to Cuck - Episode 2
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Transcript
You My washing cocktails road duck And here we are in this every driving and my girlfriend she's saying baby you're going too slow I'm going 45 that's the maximum speed before this thing shakes itself apart but I told my followers we'll Stacy was photographing beef jerky Chloe was harassing the clerk Luna was reading labels nutritional labels Raven was exciting. Where even she was existing? Threateningly. Nice rig. I turned. A man had appeared next to me. Where he came from? I couldn't say. Hell, probably. He was enormous. Muscles on muscles. A beard that could file taxes. He sure said, I got so much content. The clerk was so confused when I asked him to pose with a mop. Ready to go? Did you see that trucker guy He was huge Like intimidating huge Well I talked to him You did What did he say Well, creepy things. Amnes things. Well, that sounds like fake, but okay. Let's go. that it wasn't them. I knew nothing about engines. My expertise extended to turnkey, cargo, wind car, no-go, Dylan, no-no. A horn blared. A massive truck pulled over ahead of us. The door opened, and a man stepped out. Of course he was attractive. Of course he was built like a Greek guy who lifted weights. The universe had a success of humor. You folks need a hand? The helpful stranger asked. Till my boyfriend tried to locate it and just made confused sounds. I was assessing. Assessing, huh? What'd you assess? The stranger asked. That it was broken Oh, brilliant diagnosis, brilliant diagnosis Stacy, she laughed at his joke about me He's not really a car guy, more of a computer guy And I figured no offense buddy but you don exactly scream like of course it was Of course he had a strong jaw name He ran a mechanic shop in the next town because the universe hated me So you fix cars for a living? Oh, that's so interesting, says Stacy. Among other things, I do a lot of work with my hands, says Derek. That was that. and now Chloe's saying what other things do you wrestle you look like you wrestle used to in college the room cost 59.99 cents for that price we got one bed one chair, one bathroom and an unlimited regret the carpet was stained The best spread looked diseased And a sad clown painting Stared from the wall It's cozy huh Says Stacy Holy shit what's wrong with this girl She think that this is cozy And about the van She thought that it's vintage Well that's not how that works Well, I don't think this place follows normal rules. The bed was tiny comically tiny like a bed that we all had to sleep in Okay sleeping arrangements The bad feasts may be three people Four if we spoon. Five if we don't breathe, says Chloe. I vote silence how Chloe's saying, or we could all share naked, for democracy. No naked democracy, says Stacy. We settled in as best as we could, which wasn't very well at all. The bathroom was a horror show. Rust stains everywhere, mold in the corners. The shower had two temperatures. She was already taking pictures, finding angles that made Keanu's look artistic. Shots, we need shots, says Chloe. She was at the bar before I could suggest anything sensible, like leaving. Well, the regulars are staring at us, says Raven. Well, they're probably just curious, that's why they're staring. Well, they're staring like we're the special of the day. Well, you're being just paranoid, come on. Paranoid keeps you alive.
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